Sunday, July 29, 2007

A few forward, a few back

For every number of positive posts, there has to be a negative one, and today's is about tantrums.

For the last week, Bright Eyes has been refusing to go with me out of the house to anywhere except for preschool.

For the most part I have been able to get around this because my husband mostly works from home (he's a church minister) and I can leave him there if I have to.

However, this morning was Sunday and Daddy was already at church when Bright Eyes decided that there was NO WAY he was leaving the house or putting on his shoes, or changing his pull-up, or brushing his teeth, or or or.... you name it.

My options were:
1. Give in. But that's not really an option. We all go to church. It's pretty much a non-negotiable in our house. Besides, it's not fair to deprive Big Sister of her time with friends at Kids church. Bright Eyes had to go.

2. Ring for help. Not really an option either. Daddy was busy organising for the service and no-one else except me can handle Bright Eyes. Someone else could have taken the other children and I could have stayed with Bright Eyes, but that's not really an option either - see no. 1 above.

3. Wait until he calms down and then go. Possible, but see no. 4 below.

4. Take him and count on him calming down once we're there and settling right in.

I decided No. 4 was the best option. I knew that it could take up to half an hour to calm him, either here or there, but I knew that if I tried to move him again having calmed him here, he could very easily explode again, so calming there was the better option.

So, with deep breaths, and not a few swear words going in my head (sorry everyone) I organised the other two children, packed the bags and the snacks, and loaded the car with everything, having decided that our usual walk would be impossible.

I then walked calmly into husband's office, confronted screaming boy, picked him up kicking and squirming, carried him out of the house and plopped him in the car.

The next dilemma was the seatbelt. He wouldn't put it on. I'm not going to tell you what I did because it was illegal, but it was the best of many bad options. Needless to say, I was very slow and very careful, and we all arrived there ok.

Once there, I pulled right up next to the door of the church and let Big Sister out. Then we just sat and waited. After about 10 minutes of screaming, he let me cuddle him. Then it took another 10 minutes of huffing and puffing to talk about putting shoes on and then another 5 minutes to think up creative ways to get out the door of the car without it seeming like we were getting out of the car.

Once out, everything was fine. He had a lovely time at church and was fine, until... the next tantrum in lab time... and the next one before bath....

What is going on? I feel terrified that I've done something bad or wrong and he's going backwards again!

1 comment:

Jessica Lowe said...

I know that the situation you described would not have been fun, funny, anything like that at all....but the way you described that was quite amusing - you have a great way with words! (I especially liked the 'illegal' bit..)

I hope things like this don't continue to happen too often - will be praying for you guys.