Apprentice

Bright eyes has stepped up to become quite a good little apprentice in recent weeks. I have really noticed him enjoying doing things with me. Some examples: we took the bins out together and he helped me take the clothes off the line the other day. He has been inviting us to play constantly.

It's a good change. I was getting concerned that even though we were seeing lots of good contact with our RDI program, he was still operating on his own.

Since our holiday, he has been eating normal food and doesn't seem to be suffering any adverse effects. This is also a good step forward. Of course, he still doesn't actually like anything except Vegemite sandwiches...

Our new challenge is his habit of yelping while he watches TV. It's incredibly distracting, but there is nothing we can do about it.

Photos

If you're interested in some of our recent holiday snaps, click here.

Poor me

Yesterday Bright Eyes had a great morning, and a rotten afternoon. Something triggered off his anger - maybe he was tired*? - but he just spent the afternoon yelling at everything and everyone.

One of the things I find most difficult about him is the lack of 'prosody' in his voice. He is not able to fine tune his tone, pitch, expressions or volume. It's either on or off. And when it's on, it's loud and really really annoying.

I feel guilty about not liking his voice, and yesterday I lost it with him several times. Of course, this does absolutely nothing to help anybody. It makes him louder and angrier and gives me a sore throat and more work to do to calm everything down.

I was feeling very sorry for myself and rang my mum, whose first words were, "Oh, darling, you poor thing. I feel so sorry for you." Aaaah. With that, I could breathe again, and felt ever so much better. Thanks Mum!

*I think he probably was tired. He's been getting to sleep about 10.30pm and sleeping in until 9 for the last two months or so. But last night I couldn't believe that he was conked out at 8.30!!!

Fun things.

He's loving riding his bike with his sister in the evenings after dinner. The neighbours have commented on the 'delightful' noises from our backyard. Mostly...

Oh, and he can read! He sat down and read 'Peter and Jane' to me in full the other day - and not just by rote either.

Siblings

Bright Eyes has two siblings. The one he likes best by far is his older sister. She is almost exactly four years older - oddly enough they had the same due date!

She and Bright Eyes have an interesting relationship. She is very much in charge of their interactions and play. He will do almost anything she wants and to watch them truly playing together is a joy. They race around the lounge room playing chase, being lions and making cubby houses together.

She is very protective of him and loves him fiercely. She knows his quirks, can handle his tantrums and will often tell me what she thinks he needs if he is being difficult. Sometimes that's fine... other times it gets annoying. Once when Dad got cross at him because of impatience, she was furious!

I don't think a child could find a more wonderful older sister.

And yet her drives her crazy too. Sometimes, after a difficult afternoon with tantrums or because of her own tiredness, she just can't cope with him, and on the odd occasion I have let her eat dinner on her own in her room so that she won't explode with frustration.

We told her about autism when Bright Eyes was diagnosed. I've heard her explain to her friends sometimes, "His brain works a little bit differently, which is why he can't quite speak right. We have to teach him things so he'll know what to do."

I'm trying to be open to talk about the autism with her if she needs to. Once, after a particularly difficult day, she said, "Mummy, I really hope I don't have a child like Bright Eyes when I grow up."

My heart felt wrenched, but I was glad that she felt she could express herself. She really wasn't trying to be mean or rude. She just saw that I was struggling with him and realised that sometimes things are harder than you hope for.

I said to her, "You know, nobody wants to have a child who has struggles, but sometimes it happens, and we just have to love them even more and help them to get through it."

She has also said, "Mummy - if I have a baby with autism when I grow up, you'll know just what to do to help me."

Boy, she has confidence in me...